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There you are just starting a new position and getting the hang of it. You learn what needs to be done and how the business works. But moreover, you also notice the rapports between your workmates, who is bossing who, who calls the shots and who bows the head in a "Yes sir!" manner.

If you pay closer attention, you'll see that the ones who call the shots and on good terms with managers actually have a more-than-work sort of relationship. They go on holidays together, play tennis or have drinks in the weekends. And they watch their back, protect themselves or be prioritized for promotion just because, you know... They know the right people.

What is nepotism

This fact is called nepotism. The term comes from French language (népotisme), where actually "nepot" means nephew. It very well represents the act of favoring someone with regards to hiring, promoting and pay rise. It's not limited to relatives however, it can also refer to acquaintances or friends who receive better treatment just because they know someone. Having connections indeed increases the likelihood of finding a job, but when it comes to nepotism, they get hired just based on connections not actual skills. Check out this article about networking, to discover more!

The opposite of nepotism is meritocracy. In meritocracy, people get in their positions based on their merits, achievements and experience. Sounds lovely, but in reality, you'll for sure notice it's not always like this.

Where you can find nepotism

Wherever there's people forming any sort of organization, you'll find nepotism. Usually the small firms are more prone to nepotism. Simply because someone close is trustier than a stranger. Any business owner needs trusty people, even loyal I would say (although too much spoils).

Bigger firms, let's say medium sized have their share of nepotism. I worked in a company where everybody is hooked together in a relationship, where the delivery manager is also the godfather of marrying subordinates. Of course these people get unfair advantages. Today, the big trend in the companies is to lay off, so of course you wouldn't lay off your nephew right? You lay off the "unloyal" people, who are having different ideas than you as manager. Come on, admit it 😼

To my surprise, I also came across nepotism in reputable corporations. And it can be dire, but meritorious employees are usually harder to lay off. So I can say that in the corporations it's least likely to be affected. Just be aware of ass-kissing, it can be more dangerous, hehe.

How nepotism affects you

Needless to say, nepotism will affect your career and the daily sanity:

  1. You deserve a pay rise and the nephew snatches it instead
  2. Your opinions do not matter at all
  3. Your good ideas might be stolen and the nephew will use them as his own
  4. When it comes to laying off, you'll be on the list, not the nephew
  5. Propagates fear and distrust among colleagues

Courage is key, speaking up is inevitable

In the public sector, it's usually forbidden to hire and pay from the public money entire kins and families. In countries where corruption is high, these situations are very common. If you to take action, actually there's not much to do. Maybe just make things public to force their hand due to public opinion.

In the private sector usually it's not forbidden to hire relatives (maybe in some more regulated industries it's different). Compared to the public sector, it's actually not much you can do about it. If nepotism is affecting your work day, it's better to take it or leave. In a private company, the owner organizes everything the way he sees fit. You disagree, you're not a fit. It's that easy!

In reputable corporations, the situation can be a bit different, meaning that there might be specialized people who can support and help you out. Just try to reach out. Also going upwards in hierarchy (eg. boss of the boss of the boss) might help.

Why nobody takes action

To put it simple, it's FEAR! Fear of losing their job, fear of not having financial stability, fear of not having the funds to pay the mortgage etc, In my experience, in all companies I had colleagues whose fear can be sensed in their eyes. They are just too afraid of doing anything outside the box, having any different opinion than the boss. They lick the boss in the ass at great lengths in order to consolidate their positions. It sucks, but it is the truth. I've seen it everywhere in all the 20+ places where I worked!

Closing notes

This subject is hard to wrap up. It has lots of aspects, complications and patterns. Usually, it's not easy to deal with because it's just how human kind works on a deeper level. It's been like that for centuries. Depending on your situation, you may need to accept with with assertiveness and avoid any confrontations. You'll need to have the courage to act up if it's crossing the line. However, in a small firm, options are limited: you stay or you go. Instead, in a big company, there can be specialized people to help with any issues rising from nepotism and you are more likely to be treated with professionalism.

So in your case, what examples of nepotism you have? How do they affect you? How did you deal with them? Let me know in the contact section!